Holidays are very lonely for me. Also, Hallmark Holidays, those are the ones to create the company just to make money. I do not know if it's because I'm single, have a very small family (most of whom do not live here) or holidays are made for couples. Although, I must say, when I was married, was on vacation more aware how lonely I was in my marriage.
4 July has just. I had no plans. I love fireworks, but I'm too uncomfortable to go to see them from me. Fortunately, invited a married friend, who was there not anything special, I have dinner with her family. It was a small, quick dinner, but I was grateful when she broke the monotony of being alone. My friend spent a lot of time complaining how they get so bored during the summer. Most people in my area have a garden shed, garden pool, or belong to a country club.
You and I have none of the above. She always plans when she is married, and often comes with other couples. She takes a trip to the beach with her husband almost every weekend. It was just too hot. She works part-time, could work more, but not selected. As a friend, I wanted to support. As a therapist, if she were my patient, we will work on how to fill their time productively. But I can not always work, and I thought I was definitely wrong to complain. They say anyone who does not have a mother, how great it is to spend time with your mother? The only thing I wanted to say (in my defense), was "at least you have someone when you talk to nothing to do at home."
I do not want to be selfish, and any questions revolve around me. But I find that most people are quite insensitive to my situation, although I try not to talk about the great times I did not feel. I keep busy most of the time, and definitely not mind a day or two of me. Last night I read almost an entire book. I was lonely. I can not say I was lonely for a man, as after being single for so many years, it is not even a thought in my head. I think on some level, I hope to find someone "normal" who can appreciate given me.
Over time, I find less and less individual people to be with. I had a great group of couples who were a big part of my life for over 20 years. Things change, and you must start over. It was difficult for me, but I always seem happy and I'm comfortable to be around. I ran into an old friend at the grocery store today. We talked for about five minutes, and when we were parting, she said: "I'm glad to see you are really happy." I thought that was very interesting, especially since I "not happy" felt today.
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